Dreaming of running

I had a dream last night that I was running. I could feel the shocks going through my legs as my feet hit the pavement and the exhilaration of it all. The wind was in my hair, my breathing was deep and heavy and most of all the freedom of it all was out of this world. It felt amazing. This maybe sounds like nothing to you but after my spinal injury I struggle to walk and will never run, dance, skip or excercise again. It's the summer here and the nights are lovely and I would give half the world to be able to go for a walk. I used to go out and take the kids for a walk round our local resevoir and feed the ducks and swans. I am putting a lot of consideration into getting a wheel chair but it's a double edged sword. On one hand it would give me the freedom to go for walks (as long as someone is there to push me) but on the other hand it feels like I am giving up. I went for a medical recently and found out that what happened to me only happens to 5 or 6 people a year in this country and mostly to men. I think that makes me pretty unusual. The name for what I have is Cauda Equina Synrome which is a pretty unheard of condition but it is something that everyone suffering from sciatica should be made aware of. As the disks start to prolapse they crush the nerves of the spinal cord. The red flag signs are difficulty peeing, numbness of the legs, bottom and genital area. If it's treated quickly then there is a 95% recovery rate but in my case the hospital screwed up and I was left untreated for 2 days so I have no chance of recovery. I have been left numb from my mid bottom down to my feet. I am unable to lift my toes on my right foot and need to wear a splint to stop me tripping over them. I no longer know I need to pee and have to pee by the clock lol and so many more invisible problems that are difficult to deal with. It's changed my life in so many ways and please if I can tell you one thing it's to make the most of every day cos you never know when something will change. I went from a healthy, happy woman to suddenly finding myself disabled for the rest of my life. That's a big change. So take it from me make the most of life and dont leave your running to your dreams